"Oooooooo geez look at Fredrick Flap he is looking awfully handsome today girls, I think today’s the day!” exclaimed Eleanor only the most undeniably hideous rabbit on this side of the forest.
“Oh Eleanor I don’t know, I think you would be taking a pretty darn big risk doing something like that, you know Fredrick Flap is only the most handsome skunk in the forest!” stated Roberta.
“Oh shut up Roberty, hush you don’t know what you are talking about. I am one sexy Rabbit. I can see it in Fredrick Flap’s eyes that he wants me. I am just going to do us both a favour and ask him out on a very, very, romantic date!” boasted Eleanor. With out further ado Eleanor flipped her ears back, wiggled her toosh, shot out her buckteeth and hopped away!
Mean while back at the ranch, Fredrick Flap was deep into discussion with his chums about just how flippen ugly that darn Eleanor was. Then Tom Peep piped up, “Hey buddy! You know what would be absolutely hilarious? If we oooohhhh so slyly snuck around the forest following ol’ Eleanor around having a gay old spying of a time! Gosh wouldn’t that be wonderful!
“Gees Louise Tom Peep you are such a creep.”
“Ta heck with you Flap, if you don’t want to spy on Eleanor I sure will!” and with that Tom peep was gone in a flash!
As Eleanor was hopping toward Flap Ranch, she was rehearsing what she was going to say to Fredrick. “ Oh Fredrick Flap how I want to date you, please be mine!” Then out of nowhere Tom Peep appeared with the slimiest grin on his face! Just as Tom Peep thought he heard everything, Eleanor screeched “Ooo Tom Peep you………..” Peep didn’t even let Eleanor finish what she had to say, he was off to go tell Fredrick Flap what he had just heard!
“Fredrick, Hey Fredrick, I got some JUICY news for YOOUU. Its about that buck tooth bunny we like to call Eleanor, I over heard her saying that she was going to ask you out on some kind of romantic date and then at the end she was all like ‘please be mine.’ I think we better be coming up with some kind of plan Freddy ol boy!”
“Oooohh I am appalled, how could a rabbit as ugly as Eleanor even remotely consider going out with someone as gorgeous and stunning as I the incredible Fredrick Flap. However I got something up the seat of my pants!” Fredrick and Peep started to collaborate on just how mean they were about to be to sweet old Eleanor!
“Ppppsss…. Ppssss… ELEANOR…. Psss pssss… BE REALLY MEAN…ppss”
“ Alrighty that’s fine… I think I am going to stick to this plan and make this date unforgettable.. MWAHAAH aaaahhhh ahahahahaha!!!” And just as that very moment there was a knock on the Flap Ranch door and a curdling voice yelped.
“Ffffrrreeeeddddrrrriiiicccckkk FLAP, are you in there because I can hear you?”
“Alright, oookkkaaayy, she has arrived and I AM READY to stick it too the maaann! Oh Eleanor I have been waiting for a fine rabbit such as yourself to come knocking on my door! O baby will you go on a date with me?”
Eleanor flabbergasted, started to fall over, thank goodness for those buck teeth of hers because they held her up from falling right on her face! Once she spit the dirt out of her mouth she replied, “Oh Fredrick I never thought you would ask, of course I will!” and with that Fredrick swept her off her feet and darted down the road.
They arrived at Mucus Meadows, the most romantic place around, Fredrick pulled out a blanket to sit on. As Eleanor went to sit down Fredrick pulled the blanket out from under her causing her to loose balance and chip her tooth on a rock. Fredrick smirked as Eleanor began to cry. “ Don’t cry Eleanor it’s fine…. You will be alright!”
Just as Eleanor was settling back down Fredrick nonchalantly walked in front of her, lifted his tail, and let out raunchiest fart ever! I swear the whole forest smelt it! Eleanor vomited and then passed out. Fredrick giggled and ran away faster than anything has ever run before!
When Eleanor woke up she was so miffed she went straight to the witch doctor, Wally Wingnut. Soon as Eleanor arrived to Doc. Wingnut’s cave she began to weep in devastation telling him everything that had went on! “Oh Doc. Wingnut I have to get him back some how or else he is just going to hurt all the other helpless creatures in the forest!”
“Alright Eleanor, here is what we are going to do. Every time Fredrick Flap thinks about himself and just how handsome he is, he will let off an awful stench that will be so nauseating he himself will vomit!”
“Oh thank-you Wally Wingnut, you have just saved all the forest from an egocentric jerk!”
And that my friend’s is how the skunk got its stench!
-Janelle Tschirren
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